Say What?

I know that I am easily amused, but after seeing this statement on a box of toilet seat covers, I was struck at that need for this statement. "Provided By The Management For Your Protection."

Why does it need to say anything? They are available and I believe that most people know what they are for, but since someone felt the need to put this statement on the box, I believe it deserves a more in-depth evaluation. So let's take a look!

First - "Provided." As I said earlier, they are obviously provided or they wouldn't have been in the stall to begin with, so I find this verbiage is highly unnecessary. Like in Algebra 1, it's a "given."

Next - "By The Management" I'm happy that the management is concerned about my safety, but this raises some questions. Does this mean that the rest of the staff at the facility doesn't care about me? Do they not have my welfare in mind when they are at work? Is it just the management? Did the management personally place these toilet seat covers in the stall? If so, who was it so I can thank them. What would I have ever done without them?

Third - "For Your Protection." Protection from what? I'm not being a jack wagon here, I'm asking a fair question. Shouldn't they explain in this day and age what they are protecting someone from? Imagine this - some clown, drunk probably, sees this statement and decides to test it out, by placing this flimsy piece of paper and decides to wear it as a helmet just as he launches himself into the wall brain first. Can you imagine the lawsuit that would result from this incident? The scary part is the guy would probably win. His defense? It said for my protection!

Final question - What did this nonsense cost and is it worth it? Does anyone see this and say to them self, "wow, these people are really looking out for me. Next time I'm in the area, I will drive out of my way to use the facilities here." I seriously doubt it.

You know this statement had to start somewhere. There was one person among a group sitting at a large, probably very nice mahogany table, who mustered up all the courage he could and boldly stated "I have got the next great thing!" It was at this point they should have sent him back to his cubicle. Instead we have "Provided By The Management For Your Protection."

I know life shouldn't come to such asinine thinking, but since it has, it is JMH's duty to point them out.

That's Nice - MH