Life Lessons

Unfortunately or fortunately, depending on how you want to look at it I have had more than my share of situations in which I had the opportunity to learn a valuable life lesson. In many of these situations I had the opportunity to turn these into multiple life lessons. Some I learned easily, others, I'm still working on.

One such opportunity occurred in 1996. JM and I were returning home from Lollapalooza in Indiana. We were traveling home in one car with two other guys that went with us to the concert and were being followed by our friend Paul and 3 other friends in another car. At some point we noticed a quaint, but professional looking fireworks store off to the side of the interstate. Now JM and I were already known in our area for producing one of the most exciting and substantial July 4th home fireworks productions, but we were always looking to expand our display.

Typically we got most of our fireworks in MO at one of those "big box" fireworks stores, but this place looked different. We had talked before about needing to do something different to keep up our exciting displays that always had the neighbors talking. We both happened to see it at the same time and immediately knew we had to stop.

One issue though, we had already passed the exit and I was running late getting home. I was supposed to be at work at 2 and after 14 hours in the sun the day before and a very long night we had overslept, so there was no time for goofing around. There wasn't time to go up to the next exit and turn around. No, a quick and decisive decision was needed and I made it.

I saw one of those "authorized vehicles only" turnarounds quickly approaching. So quickly in fact that there wasn't any time to get to the inside lane or even slow down. I immediately turned the steering wheel, throwing the car into a slide, tires squealing and smoke rolling. JM was holding on to the dash, yelling and one of the guys in the back seat who had been sleeping up until this point was now wide awake with his eyes as large as Christina Ricci's. I knew this because I was looking in my rear view mirror to see not only how many cars I had cut off, but also to see if Paul was able to get slowed down in time to make the same turn. He did not.

It was still early in the cell phone days, but Paul and I both had one and it didn't take long for him to call and let JM and I know what he was thinking. What were we doing? Why didn't we tell him we were stopping? He wanted fireworks. And, most importantly, wow what a stop and turn!

After the excitement of the turn, we still didn't have time to waste. We had to get going and head back to the store, we had fireworks to buy! We pulled into the store and began our quest to find something new and different. I knew when we entered this little red barn we had found exactly what we had hoped.

Because space was limited this place hadn't wasted a lot of floor with "smalls," which was good, because we weren't interested in sparklers and smoke bombs. No, we wanted big, loud and spectacular and there was wall to wall big, loud and spectacular. We had found the fireworks sweet spot. In addition there was only one main worker and he was also the owner and he was passionate about what he was selling. We quickly explained to him that we didn't have much time and why we were there. Big was good, but we wanted quality too. Something to set ourselves apart. Like a machine he began methodically showing us what we needed. Like a fat kid in a free cake store we were giddy with excitement.

Once we had what we needed, we added a couple of extra items just in case. JM and I had learned in the last 5 years that there was no such thing as too many fireworks. Now we had to checkout and go. Time was slipping away from me and I knew I was already late for work. As the owner began ringing up the stuff I reached for my wallet. Now this wasn't a planned purchase, so I knew I didn't have enough cash. I turned to JM and although we always took extra cash to these outings, we had far exceeded our emergency cash stash with this purchase. So there was only one thing to do, we couldn't let this magnificent haul get away from us.

I reached into my wallet and pulled out a credit card. The owner finally got finished ringing each of our items up and gave me the total. I handed over my Visa and JM started organizing things so we could quickly get moving. Now, everyone knows that feeling when it starts taking a second or two longer than it should for the clerk to give your credit card back. One second turned into two, two turned into three and I quickly realized that something wasn't right. I started thinking of everything it might be. Over the credit limit? No, can't be. Missed payment? No, I distinctly remember sending it in. What could this possibly be?

The owner looks at the card reader and then looks at me. I will never forget what he says next. "I need you to stay right here." I was like, no kidding dude, I need my credit card back before I go anywhere. But the way he said it didn't give me any comfort and I was starting to panic. He goes over to a little doorway and I see that he's using the phone. Ok, good. He's calling someone to either fix his machine or straighten out any confusion about my credit card. I had plenty of credit line and hadn't ever missed a payment. This would soon be straightened out and we would be on our way. Which was desperately needed because I was way late now.

He comes back and tells me, just be patient and this will all be handled. Patience is something I was quickly running out of at this point. I asked him pointedly, "what's the problem?" No answer. I looked at the card reader and it read "Pick Up Card." I wasn't sure what that meant at the time, but it didn't seem promising. At that point he asked, "can I see your driver's license?" Ok, now we are getting somewhere. I'm obviously me and that's my card, so sure, here it is and now we can get going. Thankfully he seemed satisfied that I was who I said I was, but apparently he had ulterior motives, "your credit card is reading that it's stolen." He explained that he couldn't give it back to me and that the police had been called and were on their way. He further explained that he now had all my information, so it would be best if I didn't try to run.

At this point I was beyond freaking out. JM was looking at me all confused. He knew there had to be a huge mistake, but what were we going to do now? At this instant, I remembered that I had lost one of my credit cards and had reported it lost or stolen a couple of weeks before. I had looked for weeks for it prior to reporting it, but now I knew immediately that I had found my lost credit card...unfortunately for me, this was not how I wanted to find it. I explained the situation to the owner and calmly asked him if he would look at the back of the card and give me the phone number off of it. Surprisingly he did.

I called customer service and explained what had happened, gave them my information and convinced them that I wasn't some hardened credit card thief. I was able to give them enough identifiable information that they confirmed that although I was moron and in error about my credit card being lost, I wasn't a thief and hadn't stolen my own card. It was at this point the police were pulling up and I knew I needed to get the owner on my side quickly. I gave him the phone and asked the customer service rep to help clear things up. If they rescinded the notice that this was a stolen card then I could pay for the fireworks with another card and we could be on our way. Finally when he hung up the phone, he smiled, handed me back my card and said "you might want to go ahead and cut that up." Crisis averted! The police came in the store, the owner quickly waved them off and told them that it had been handled. Finally we had our fireworks and were on our way.

I finally made it to work that night and a couple of nights later JM and I put on one of our best fireworks displays ever.

The life lessons learned? 1. The best fireworks are never found in the "big box" stores. 2. Always use a turn signal when turning. 3. Always have a spare credit card. 4. Make sure your credit card is lost before reporting it. 5. Tell your friends where you are going. But the most important life lesson learned? When looking for things, they are always in the last place you look!

That's nice...MH